Wednesday, April 19, 2006

In which I talk about what an idiot I am

The label on the pattern says "Easy." It lies. The person who labeled this pattern has never met the likes of me, and has a completely different idea of what "easy" is than I do.

I'm frustrated. How can a simple little bag be so freaking difficult? Why is this so hard for me? I didn't think I was an idiot, but step by step I'm being proven wrong. So far, I'm getting each step done eventually, but it's taking me s o o o o o long to get there. Right now, one of the little flaps on the side is crooked, and the seams between the top and the bottom of the bag don't line up. (I'd take a picture, but I think I'm obviously too much of an idiot to use the camera. I don't want to risk breaking it.) I've decided I'm okay with that, for what is essentially my first sewing project ever.

Now I'm trying to make the handles for the bag. This involves sewing a rectangle of fabric into a tube around some cording. OH, the panic! How in the . . . oh, yes, I see, I have to use a zipper foot. Of course.

WAIT! That means I have to actually CHANGE something on the machine? Oh, crap. OK, calm down, I'm smart enough to do this. Which one is the zipper foot? No, no, no -- ah, this one, it should be downhill from here. HA! Why. . . won't . . . the . . . flipping . . . thing . . . go . . . on . . . maybe if I just push harder . . . oh, yeah, read the directions, Carrie, you have to pick a side. Snap, that's done, here we go.

What time is it now? Oh, TWO AND A HALF HOURS LATER, I have decided that the rectangle is too narrow to sew around the cord I got. It's that simple, and I am not going to waste anymore of my time trying to do this. I'm going to cut out two WIDER pieces of fabric, and while I'm at it longer because I want longer handles anyway, and try again.

Some other day.